Like many 11-year-old girls, Madison Root has braces. Wanting to help her parents’ pay the orthodontist, Madison decided to sell little pieces of mistletoe she clipped off bushes at her uncle’s farm.
Last Saturday morning she stood at the well-trafficked Portland Saturday Market and sold the holiday favorite, each hand-wrapped and tied with a red bow. That’s when security personnel arrived.
A private security guard told Madison that her entrepreneurial initiative was a crime. The market is held in a public park and Portland city ordinance bans little girls from selling mistletoe without proper approval from city bureaucrats.
Little Madison committed the shocking crime of practicing capitalism without a license.
The New York Times asked its readership “What Does Black Friday Mean for You?” A few choice comments reveal the tone of the other 318:
To me it means getting in the car with my spouse and adult daughters and heading to Cape May...Birding! None of us buy into this nonsensical consumer binge day.
We interrupt the collapse of the U.S. health insurance system to announce that Colorado’s health exchange did something dumb.
Granted, the Front Range brain trust has set a low bar for itself, what with the shivering co-eds they paid to walk around Denver in their skivvies. And who could forget last month’s Brosurance adfeaturing the dumbest, whitest seventh-year undergrads in the state keg-standing their nation to insolvency?
One would think that the Colorado Consumer Health Initiative would have watched a few Mad Men eps before trying their hands at another campaign. Au contraire.
Worried that the bro-only focus left out the ladies, the site DoYouGotInsurance.com (actual name) decided to make young women look dumb too.
Back when I was a wee li’l blogger just finding my way in the online world, I created a lot of Photoshops (like this, this and this). They were fun to make, but as we entered the Age of Obama, the actual photos became funnier than anything I could create (like this, this and this).
The deeper we fall into the President’s progressive rabbit hole, the more ridiculous the images get. Take Colorado’s latest effort to con encourage young, healthy Americans to sign up for Obamacare.
The Centennial State launched its “Get Covered” effort by paying nearly naked models to prance around downtown Denver in flesh-toned skivvies. How this stunt escaped the notice of ever-vigilant feminist groups is beyond me, but it apparently had little impact.
When Washington raised the debt ceiling this week, the Beltway media breathlessly reported that the fiscal crisis had ended. Lawyers danced in hallways, bureaucrats twerked on the Metro, congressional aides kissed strangers in the streets — the Tea Party has been defeated! It was like VJ day for wonks.
As our political class exchanged high fives and reporters praised a return to “sanity,” I wondered how these odd creatures defined insanity.
America’s fiscal crisis is not that our debt ceiling was too low, the fiscal crisis is that our debt is too high. When I mentioned this to left-leaning folks, they seemed indifferent. “Obama lowered the deficit.” “I think Bush spent more.“ “It’s Reagan’s fault!”
So I made this infographic:
There was panic at supermarkets over the weekend. Low-income Americans in 17 states were turned away from cash registers due to a computer outage affecting their electronic food-stamp cards.
Outrage erupted in store aisles and even on Twitter.
October is Bullying Prevention Awareness Month, according to StopBullying.gov — a federal website that is suspiciously still operating during the government’s draconian 17% shutdown.
The official website defines bullying as “unwanted, aggressive behavior” that involves “a real or perceived power imbalance.” Instead of focusing on grade-school toughs administering swirlies and wedgies, government should focus on the far more sinister bullying from their own bureaucracy.
A businessman named Craig Zucker sold sets of small, strong magnetic spheres called BuckyBalls. In 2009 his creation became an Internet sensation and by the following year his company had $10 million in sales.
The federal government is posting a lot of messages to inform you that they won’t be posting any more messages. Here are the most passive-aggressive shutdown alerts so far.
Today, Americans awoke to the dystopian hellscape created by a government shutdown. Did we say shutdown? Okay, it’s more of a temporary rollback of non-essential services. Nonetheless, the government wants to assure you that anarchy is sweeping the land.
Back in May, our Divider in Chief trolled the critics of his disastrous "Affordable" Care Act. "It's. The. Law." the official White House Twitter account stated, along with a photo of Obama's signature on the legislative train wreck.
Since then, "it's the law" has been a favorite Democratic talking point on why Obamacare is somehow impossible to repeal. The President doubled down on this novel theory in his comments Monday:
This past weekend I had the privilege of attending a discussion with authors and radio hosts Dennis Prager and Hugh Hewitt. While the Sunday talk highlighted faith and culture over politics, Prager did share his oft-quoted maxim, "the bigger the government, the smaller the citizen."
According to a new Gallup poll, Americans are starting to agree. In an all-time high, 60% of Americans believe the federal government has too much power.